Friday, May 2, 2008

Fast Food Fiend!

I like Big Macs and I cannot lie (hummed to the tune of Baby Got Back). My head is hanging in shame as I type this. My anthem used to go something like this, two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun. Okay, I could do without the shredded lettuce and could you put more sauce on that. I need something to dip my fries in. It was almost a daily pilgrimage to pray at the altar of the Golden Arches. It was always a medium #1 no lettuce extra sauce w/a Mr. Pibb. MJ is trying to help me correct the error of my ways. He calls it the Evil Clown and he's right b/c that friendly Ronald McDonald is now making me sick. And it's like a bad relationship. You know you should break up, but it just feels so good so right when you're with him. Sorry, got a little distracted as I thought about that cheese, that sauce. Of course, QZ is helping MJ in his quest to save me. I'll let you know how it goes.

Now, the Golden Arches isn't the only joint to have their hooks in me. The King used to be my late night, post work honey. It was always a #1, a Whopper with cheese no onion (heartburn after 10 if I ate them) with Dr. Pepper. After a while I switched up and had the whopper jr. with cheese etc., it was a number three. I still love The King, but a little bit less everyday.

Yo Quiero Taco Bell! When I worked pt in college, Taco Bell was across the street and on the way home. They used to have something called a bacon cheeseburger burrito. It had my most favorite food on so how could I say no. It was quite tasty. Thank goodness I don't work there anymore and that TB doesn't sell those darn bacon cheeseburger burritos anymore either.

Don't let that innocent smile fool you on the Wendy's. Something sinister lurks behind those laughing eyes. It's the knowledge that hot and fresh and greasy, the fries are addictive. Add in a cold, sweet Frosty. If I was really hungry, It would be a #1 (I'm sensing a theme here), a classic single w/cheese no onion.

Again, I hang my head in shame recalling how easily seduced I am by the bright lights and neon signs of the denizens of America's expanding waistlines. Some nights it was a menage a trois as I stopped at McD's for a Big Mac, BK for a Dr. Pepper and Wendy's for fries or a frosty. We won't talk about the Roy Rogers incidents. I am not over my old friends, but we are no longer the bosom buddies we used to be. I see them in passing from time to time. However, they don't hold the same appeal for me anymore.

What are your favorite fast food spots? Are you stuck on #1 like myself? Or does it depend on your mood? Do you try to recreate your favorites at home?


Anonymous said...

Down with the burger! Make PETA proud! (And save money)


Oatmeal Cookie Guy said...

It's not necessarily fast, but I absolutely LOVE Rosa Mexicano. I could their salsa verde until my mouth bursts into flames. Sooo good.

I also like a NYC burger place called BRGR. Aside from great burgers, they have the best playlist of 80s music and Britpop.

Anonymous said...

It is me, azmomX3. I am ashamed to admit but I was a fast food junky and a creature of habbit. I ordered the same thing the same way every time. The workers recognized my voice when I said hello and already knew my order. Taco Bell, McDonalds, Panda Express, Wendy's, I knew them all. I'm proud to say I no longer frequent the drive thru and stick to cooking at home.